Saturday, August 09, 2003

Just as dignified as Schwarzenegger

Paul Bremer is to import 47,000 AK-47s for use by the new Iraqi army, because what Iraq really needed was more assault rifles.

I have been asked how it’s possible that a recall election would still go ahead even if Davis resigns. In truth, no one is really sure what the law calls for. I mean, it does say that “The vacancy shall be filled as provided by law, but any person appointed to fill the vacancy shall hold office only until a successor is selected in accordance with Article 4 commencing with Section 11360) or Article 5 (commencing with Section 11380), and the successor qualifies for that office.” The problem with this, which shows how screwed up the state constitution is, is that neither section 11360 nor 11380 actually exist anymore. The theory that the lt. governor becomes only an acting governor until the recall election is just that, since the constitution says he becomes governor. It’s not impossible that Bustamante would be out of a job altogether.

Schwarzenegger’s employment policy, in his own words: “that everyone will have a fantastic job”. Dictionary definition of fantastic: imaginative or fanciful; remote from reality. Or maybe he meant a fantastic nose-job.

The Sunday NYT has a story about the use of outdated punchcards in the recall election, and notes their higher error rates and that they’re mostly in areas occupied by poor people. It fails to contrast this with the recall petition itself, which was mostly signed by people who live in other areas, predominantly Orange County and San Diego.

The 99¢ Stores did find a 100-year old candidate.

The porn star also running, who neither Chris nor I have ever heard of (or so Chris says), says that she is just as dignified as Schwarzenegger, and she can speak English. Well, moan in English.

Here’s another story of US troops shooting up a car in Iraq for no good reason. What’s this, the 53rd time this has happened? How could it be allowed to happen over and over and over? Anyway, they killed most of the family, including 3 children. 2 children and the father might have survived, but the soldiers refused to let them be taken to the hospital, and they bled out on the street. What happened is that a different car a block away was moving a little too fast as it approached a different roadblock. So the soldiers at the roadblock fired at it (they killed the driver, then pulled the two passengers out and went Rodney King on their asses), and the other soldiers up the street heard the gunfire and just started shooting at random (it was night time and dark) for the hell of it, and then the guys in the watch-tower joined in. At this moment the abd al-Kerim family had the misfortune to pull up. The reporter says that the next day there were bullet casings everywhere, shot-up parked cars and bullet holes in absolutely every direction.

The Indy also has a story about the US use of napalm in Iraq. And a story about how the US has demolished the villa in which they Bonnie-and-Clyded Usay, Qusay and Mustafa Hussein, although not before CIA agents went through and stole souvenirs--and I actually mean souvenirs, in a personal rather than professional capacity, unless you count selling the stuff on Ebay.

The London Times has a lovely story about women who have surgery done on their feet to allow them to fit into fashionable shoes.

There’s a scandal a-brewing in Israel that I don’t think has been reported here. Ariel Sharon’s primary run in Likud before becoming prime minister was funded by an illegal $1.5 million loan, which now seems to have come from some Austrian businessman (they’re everywhere!), possibly to get Sharon to restore full diplomatic relations with Austria after gay fascist Jorg Haider joined the government (they were in fact restored). Both Sharon’s sons have taken the 5th during the investigation. Did you know that in Israel sons can’t be compelled to testify against their fathers, or, I believe, vice versa?

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